Dudo ka special tadka - Onion Blues

Introducing DuDo a special tadka!! Hope you like the series of new comic strips!  

Onion Blues......

100th post - Hmm a milestone

Hi guys dis is my 100th post, I finally decided to make you laugh rather than my philosophies and serious stuffs. These were few funny forwards which i received. Being a management student. I remember this and wish to share with you all.

MANAGEMENT LESSON 1:

A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?" The crow answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Moral of the story is:
To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.......  

MANAGEMENT LESSON 2:

When the body was first made, all the parts wanted to be Boss.
The brain said, "I should be Boss because I control the whole body's responses and functions."
The feet said, " We should be Boss as we carry the brain about and get him to where he wants to go.
" The hands said, "We should be the Boss because we do all the work and earn all the money.
"And so it went on and on with the heart, the lungs and the eyes until finally the asshole spoke up.
All the parts laughed at the idea of the asshole being the Boss.
So the sshole went on strike, blocked itself up and refused to work.
Within a short time the eyes became rossed, the hands clenched, the feet twitched, the heart and lungs began to panic and the brain fevered.
Eventually they all decided that the asshole should be the Boss, so the motion was passed.
All the other parts did all the work while the Boss just sat and passed out the shit!

Moral of the story is:

You don't need brains to be a Boss - any asshole will do

MANAGEMENT LESSON 3:


A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it.
As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was.
The dung was actually thawing him out!
He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.
A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate.
Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him!  
Remember here there are 3 morals

a) Not everyone who drops shit on you is your enemy.
b) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
c) And when you're in deep shit, keep your mouth shut!

Customer Care in 2020::: funny must read

Operator : "Thank you for calling Pizza Galaxy Kholi . May I have your..."


Customer: "Hello, can I order.."


Operator : "Can I have your multi purpose card number first, Sir?"


Customer: "It's eh..., hold........ ..on..... .889861356102049 998-45-54610"


Operator : "OK... you're... Mr Singh and you're calling from 43rd Floor, Akask View Apt, Cantt Road, ........

Your home number is 4094! 2366, your office 76452302 and your mobile is

0142662566. Which number are you calling from now Sir?"


Customer: "Home! How did you get all my phone numbers?


Operator : "We are connected to the system Sir"


Customer: "May I order your Seafood Pizza..."


Operator : "That's not a good idea Sir"


Customer: "How come?"


Operator : "According to your medical records, you have high blood pressure and even higher cholesterol level Sir"


Customer: "What?... What do you recommend then?"


Operator : "Try our Low Fat Hokkien Mee Pizza. You'll like it"


Customer: "How do you know for sure?"


Operator : "You borrowed a book entitled "Popular Hokkien Dishes" from the National Library last week Sir"


Customer: "OK I give up... Give me three family size ones then, how much will that cost?"


Operator : "That should be enough for your family of 10, Sir. The total is Rs 2249.99"


Customer: "Can I pay by! credit card?"


Operator : "I'm afraid you have to pay us cash, Sir. Your credit card is over the limit and you owe your bank Rs10,720.55 since October last year.

That's not including the late payment charges on your housing loan, Sir."


Customer: "I guess I have to run to the neighbourhood ATM and withdraw some cash before your guy arrives"


Operator : "You can't Sir. Based on the records, you've reached your daily limit on machine withdrawal today"


Customer: "Never mind just send the pizzas, I'll have the cash ready. How long is it gonna take anyway?"


Operator : "About 45 minutes Sir, but if you can't wait you can always come and collect it on your scooter.. ."


Customer: " What!"


Operator : "According to the details in system, you own a Lambretta 1969 Vintage Scooter,...registration number USE 8999..."


Customer: " ????"


Operator : "Is there anything else Sir?"


Customer: "Nothing... by the way... aren't you giving me that 3 free bottles of cola as advertised?"


Operator : "We normally would Sir, but based on your records you're also diabetic.... ... "


Customer: #$$^%&$@$%^


Operator : "Better watch your language Sir. Remember on 11th Nov 1986 you were convicted for using abusive language on a policeman who stopped you for driving through a one way, in fact you were driving a 1973 Ambassador bearing registeration number UTD 4267.......


Customer: [Faints]