Thursday, July 8, 2010

Interview Blues!!!

Interviewer:
Hello,

Have a seat....
'Please introduce your self'

DuDo: I've been doing this since I finished my course. I think i should record it "blah blah blah"


Interviewer: 'What attracted you to the position?'
 DuDo: Excuse me I'm still unemployed "Well... sir, people have varied thoughts, I enjoy meeting them. I feel  this opening in your firm will be very challenging for a guy me"

Interviewer: 'Did you meet many people in your last job?

DuDo:  "Yes" Of course I met people.  What a pointless question. my resume talks about my last job. " I met many corporates in my last job, as a business development manager before my post graduation"

Interviewer: 'Have you ever had to deal with a difficult customer?'

DuDo: Good, that's easy.  "Oh yes, lots of times."

 Interviewer: 'What kinds of problems did you have to deal with?'

DuDo: "Oh, all kinds." Try selling a webspace ads to the traditional businessmen, grrrrhh..  Too many to name.  Think of one quick.  "I once had to deal with a customer who had questioned why should i advertise  on your site? You yourself will click on to my ads and use up all my ad impressions in a day"

Interviewer: 'This job requires intensive traveling are you comfortable with being in several places at once?'

DuDo: You are not askin me how i handled it? It was a funny situation...  aah what a question :  I don't know if I can. "I'm confident that I can pick up the job quickly"

Interviewer : 'How much training do you think you'll need?'

DuDo:  ahaaa, dont you have a training period? "It took me about a week to be fully trained for my last job.  I pick things up quickly."


Interviewer: 'What qualities do you feel you can bring to this role?'

DuDo: Dont you have any other question? don't you know all the candidates make up these things on the spot? "I'm patient, I'm well organised, practical and I'm punctual" Do you want more?


Interviewer: Will a person with a profile like this stick to this job?

DuDo: Give the job 1st for gods sake then i will think of switching "Sir if you are providing me a good package i will definitely stick on to this job"

 Interviewer: 'All right.  Now, is there anything you'd like to ask me?'

DuDo:  Oh no, I can't think of anything! "when will i get to know the interview results"


Interviewer: 'We will shortlist the candidates in a week and we will inform you about it. and will discuss about the package if you are selected'

DuDo: Wow you read my mind i was supposed to ask you about the BLING!!

Interviewer: Anything else do you want to ask?


DuDo: Um…  "No."

Interviewer: 'Thank you.  We'll be in touch.'

DuDo:  "Thank you and have a great day ahead sir"


Disclaimer: These is just my attempt to be funny, interviewers please over look this post :D hehe and give me a job...

 P.S Thoughts in my mind are in red 
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3 comments:

  1. lolz.. Nice & Funny Post :D

    ReplyDelete
  2. Dear Shrijith,
    Good Morning!
    Hearty Congratulations on your grand success!
    First attempt on a funny post is good!The problems is of the KURSSI!On the other side power and positin and this side yet to to attain both!
    I used to read a lot on the model interviews given in Competition Success and Review.I enjoy reading them.
    Patience pays and experience counts.You have abright future.May God Bless You!
    Wishing you a placement very soon,
    Sasneham,
    Anu

    ReplyDelete
  3. thx arpit :)


    @anu thx anu for yor wishes :).. na this is not my 1st attempt to be funny... Dudoism is funny side of a boring life... you should read my other funny posts :)

    ReplyDelete

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